12.23.2008

Follow.Thru

Are you serious...?
So, it seems that plans with Cali [code-name] did not follow through.  I was suppose to go to his house after I went to the cemetery with my G-ma. However, plans got pushed back a lil. When he was in town, I was just leaving to go get her. He was wondering if he should wait. I told him nah cause we got to go out wayyy in the country. I was under the impression he was gonna come back and get me when I returned home. The drive is only a few minutes. Sooo, I just called him: 
He says, "So are you gonna come see me?
I replied, "Yeah, when you come get me."
He says, "Ams, for real?!"
"Yeahhh, " I respond.
Then he continues to explain how he waited on me and how I told him to go ahead. Misunderstanding, basically. *sigh* I know, I could drive just as well as he, but I just feel he should come to me first...he's the guy. Call it old-fashioned if ya want. 
 
Hm, I don't know...
I'm starting to feel bad about that whole situation again. I know he cares more about me than I, him. That's why I decided we should just be friends. I believe he deserves better...ya know? Someone who will love him just the same. I don't want to just stop all communication with him, he is a very nice, respectable, cool guy. However, sometimes he starts to get too "heavy." Plus, I have come to the conclusion and accepted the fact that I'm into the "bad guys." Sorry.
I know you may be thinking "Typical! She finds a good dude, but don't want him." Well, yeah its true...but pardon me if I won't put him through heartache. I refuse to play with someone's emotions like that. After months of being in a relationship, I realized that I seriously doubted I could ever fall in love or give him the emotional support he wants/needs. I got some things to work out within myself. Call it what you want, shawty! Haha. But eh, tell me what would you do?
Anyway,my irritation may just be from how he continuously called to wake me up earlier. [Its this thing I would usually do, call him real early to wake him up on purpose.] I can't really complain cause I do it to him, but I didn't go to sleep til like 7. He wasn't the only one tho...I had like 5-7 calls! Don't you just hate that? You enjoying some goooood sleep, next thing you know...*ring, ring* on the celly! Haha. Hm, I reckon I'll go out there and visit him tomorrow. [Speaking of the devil, he just texted. Haha.]
I just got a lot planned for this week: 1. I need to go visit one of my best friends...we've been friends since kindergarten. I didn't get to catch up with her during Thanksgiving break. 2. I need to have an outing/pep-talk with this lil' girl I look after. Her sister called me and asked if I would have a talk with her cause she is acting up in school and her grades are slipping. So basically, thats a must do. 3. I have yet to go Christmas shopping. [maybe that should be #1] Haha. 4. I need to visit the B.D.'s [code-name] fam. Thats about all I can really think of. *sigh* Welp, I guess I'm bout to head back to my G-ma's...after I pick up a chocolate milkshake. =]

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